Hello? Stork?

Hi everyone! I'm coming to you upside down, uncomfortable, and impatient from my home, the Womb. I knew I never should have booked those tickets to see that puppet show! The darn thing was last week. I thought I'd be out of here by then. Well, I'm not out, the puppet show has come and gone (with rave reviews by all, I might add), and here I am, just a few days away from my expected due date. I know, I know, you are all probably wondering why I'm impatient, when the due date isn't even here yet; well, its because doctors, nurses, Internets, Mommies, Daddies, strangers, strange people, and several muppets have told me I'd be out long ago. I had my stuff packed, turned, and then...nothing. I've been upside down for a month now. I don't like it very much.

Breathe, Wee Too! Breathe! Phew. I get caught up in being impatient sometimes. I am a born procrastinator, as you know, but at the same time, I don't like waiting very much. Especially for something as important as being born! I mean, I was content to be in here, but then I got my hopes up that I'd be out, then everyone told me it would be better if I stayed in and got a little bigger, so I stayed in and got a little bigger, but then I was big enough, but my stork got lost, so I'm still in here and a big toddler whaps me everyday and I like it and I just want out to whap him and play with him too! Breathe! Breathe! Daddy says I am like my Mommy sometimes when I talk like that, and Mommy says, "You try having a baby in your belly nine months!" and Daddy gets quiet and makes me and Mommy sandwiches.

Am I ranting? A little, I guess. I've just been a little bored today. Stomach was sleepy, so she napped all Day. Bladder is mad at me (a little) because I am too big, and the rest of my Insider friends are squished out of the way to make room for big ole me. I received a clown-a-gram today that my Stork is just now clearing customs, and might (possibly) be cleared for flight by Saturday, but no guarantees are being made. The consulate is involved, and lobbying for the stork's clearance. But, I guess I should just bepatient and wait a little while longer. Breathe! Breathe!

Well, I think I might go read an upside down book for a while to pass the time. It is a classic, "O', Contracteth Ye, Mdm. Uterus" It is an epic poem about a distinguished lady named Uterus. I wish you all well, and hopefully I'll see you soon! Hooray for almost being out!