My Stork is Lost!

Still Inside, everyone. Yes, much to the dismay of poor, dear, swollen, sore, and achy Mommy, I'm still holding on here on the Inside. Mommy has been feeling very crampy today, so maybe that is a sign I am ready to graduate from the Inside. I'd like to think so, at least. It is getting very cramped in here. Personally, I'm ready to go. My bags are packed, and I am harnassed into by Stork gear - the straps and swaddle. Edgar appears to be missing in action. I've not heard from my stork in quite some time. Intelligence from Bladder's secret source told me that Edgar went out for a practice run, got caught in the jet stream, and is now over the Himalayas. I certainly hope that this is wrong. I really don't know what I'd do if my Stork were not to show. Daddy told me that Uterus would eventually evict me if the stork does not show. I asked big brother about this, and he described Uterus as an angry, vile, bitter old grump. She squeezed and squoze and pushed him out. It was a very odd experience, he told me. I plan on researching it a bit more, just in case.

Big brother has been playing with me quite a bit lately. He is very anxious to meet me. When poor Mommy is reclining on the couch, watching her shows, big brother comes over shouting, "Bel-ly! Bel-ly!" I get all excited and kick and squirm and punch, and squirm. Big brother then begins with some whapping on Mommy's belly. It is very loud on the Inside. It does not hurt, but I don't think toddlers are the most gentle of the Outsiders. I do like it though. I try to whap back, but it usually sends Mommy to the bathroom because Bladder cries, and then Stomach groans because when big brother whaps it tickles, and I'm ticklish, so I end up reflex kicking Stomach a few good ones. I can't wait until I'm old enough to whap things. It is one of my life's goals, you know. Maybe someday, Mommy will have a different baby in her belly - a little sister or brother - and I can whap him or her. I'd like very much to do that.

Darn. Bladder's European Swallow just flew in, laden with a message. Bladder sent the swallow out on a reconnaissance mission to find out about my stork. From the intelligence gathered by the swallow, it seems that Edgar is not over the Himalayas, but is trapped in an updraft over Norway. He had taken out the balloon to get a feel for 'er, and went a tad too high. He got sucked up into the jet stream, was sent over the Atlantic, and is now stationary over Norway. The Organisation of Storks and Baby Carrying Birds with Big Beaks has sent out a team of specialists to try and get Edgar back over local territory. Let's hope they succeed. So, this means I'll not be coming out too soon, but it all depends on how efficient the rescue team is at getting Edgar back.

So, I think I'll turn out the lights on another day, and wait patiently for either my stork to return, or for Uterus to get angry and evict me. My Insider friends have been dressed in cheerleader outfits for the past week, ready to give me encouragement when the moment arrives for me to make my journey. Stomach has a couple of pom-poms made from shredded garbage bags, and Bowel has a trumpet. Apparently, they have worked on a few cheers especially for me! I can't wait to hear them. Well, I'm off to the land of rest. Wish my stork luck, and hopefully I'll see you all soon!