Things are Happenin' (slooooowly)

Chip, chip, tap. Chip, chip, tap. Splunk.

That is the cheerful sound of a wee little baby (me) hammering away at a fine (mucus) plug. Chip, chip, tap. As part of my graduating from the Inside present, Bladder gave me a Junior Geologists fun kit. It has a little hammer, and a small broom for sweeping away fossils and membranes. Since yesterday, I've been chipping and tapping away at good ole plug. I feel like a miner. This evening, all my chipping and tapping paid off. Splunk. I finally tapped that old plug out of the way! I'm one step closer to becoming an Outsider!

The past couple of days have actually been rather eventful. On Tuesday evening, I started making Mommy feel really crampy. I had been tickling Uterus, as I read this was a sure fire way to aggravate her. It worked, somewhat. She got tight for a bit, then yelled, then loosened, then stayed tight for a day, then loosened, and now is sleeping. She was mad, but not mad enough to squeeze me out. Angry Uterus made Mommy really crampy. She said things like, "Oh my uterus!" and "Keep on a crampin'! Labour, here I come!" But, labour has, unfortunately not come yet.

On Wednesday morning, I had my weekly appointment with Good Doctor. She did the normal things, like listent o my heart, and take Mommy's blood pressure, and ask how we were doing, and so on. Mommy asked if she could check to see if any progress was being made on my arrival. So, Good Doctor did. And the news was good! You see, in order for me to come out, I have to pass by the Guardian. The Guardian is a girl named Cerra C. Cervix. She is really storng, and holds me safely Inside. When you knock on her door, she asks you a question. When you get it right, she opens her door 1 cm. So far, I've knocked on her door a few times, and have got three questions right! Knock once, I did, and C. C. Cervix did ask, "What is your name?" "Wee Too" replied I with confidence. I came back the next day, and knocked again did I. "What is your quest?" she did ask. "To seek the Outside". And she opened centimeter two. I came back again, and knocked thrice. "What is your favourite colour?" and with confidence I replied, "Blue." A third centimeter she did open. So, when Good Doctor checked Mommy, she replied, "Goodness! Wee Too has been busy! 3 cms dilated! Goodness" Mommy shreiked with joy at the progress I'd made. I've since asked further questions, but they have all been difficult. The last one was "What is the capital of Assyria" or something like that. Anyway, having made a short story very long, Cervix is openeing, and will soon let me out. Phew. I can be too long winded sometimes. Sheesh.

So, things are happenin'. Plugs are fallin' out. C. C. Cervix is lettin' me see the Outside, a centimeter at a time. Mommy is all crampy, then not crampy, then wants to be crampy again, but isn't then is. Lots going on. I think I might go get some rest now. Things may be moving quicker soon. Hopefully. I'll need my strength if I'm to make my trip into your world. Wish me luck. Hopefully, next time I write, it'll be to regail you with the heroic tale of my journey into the Outside. But, I may still be in here a week or more. Who knows. All my best to you!